<body>
.
2010-09-02

there's a reason my brothers left and never looked back. its more than the fact as an adult this town is a terrible boring place.

my moms nagging is unbearable. she has NO regard for what you may be doing or have going on. in truth, she doesn't care. she wants done what she wants done at that exact moment. and will nag and yell and follow you around until she gets her way.

its suffocating and infuriating. unlike my brothers, i freak out. now that i'm older i can't tolerate this behavior of hers any longer. i flip, right when it starts. just yelling a refusal at the top of my lungs peppered with obscenities.

obviously i choose the mature response that diffuses the situation. ha. i wonder if i will ever be able to take the mature route, or after all these years of these gruesome long dramatic fights the yelling and escalated fighting is hardwired into me.

if it is, i should never have kids probably.

so anyways her nagging and pressures results in my explosive reaction, because even after all these years i can't control myself. and then she gets even more crazy. and tries to hit me. not in a abusive way really, she's just so frustrated and pissed it makes sense at the time. like, she just smacked me on the back as hard as she could. yeah it stings, but its not that big of a deal.

its just...childish. I mean really. just because she couldn't get her way. because i wouldn't drop EVERYTHING I was doing to look for something, which honestly isn't important at all. (my garage door opener. not for her,she didn't need it. she just wanted me to find it because that was her current whim, even though its been gone for 4+ years.) I already informed her its the bf's birthday today and i have alot to do and i really don't have time for this shit. its been gone for YEARS. its not like its just going to pop up. it would take HOURS of searching, if its even here.

i just can't stand her sometimes. it's crazy how good and fun things can be, and then she slowly turns back into the naggy controlling person. its like first its once, then a few times. and i'm cool about it. but soon, every time she is alone with me it starts. then finally i am fed up. every conversation is an explosive argument. she has to nag EVERY time she talks to you. even when your supposed to be doing something pleasant.

i have to get out of here. i need to stop spending and just save, save, save.

<< then &hearts now >>

profile
Listen up.

links.

latest entry

about me

archives

notes

DiaryLand

contact

random entry

affiliates
omfggwtf
tattoobelly
rhetoric
tinfoilheart
hotwaterlove
srslyimeanit
duplicitous
evilyoyo
smartypants
weetabix
thecity
symmetries
over-rated
shot-of-tea
kellifornia
agitated
traumatease
slickasgrace
dirty-a-sid
absolutgal82
faultyvision
symmetree
priceless
punkunicorn
s-i-l-v-e-r
dandelionkat
destinedstar
ladiebug
pinupgirl
crimsonstar
limbless

credits
This blogskin is proudly presented to you by Anna May.

hosted by DiaryLand.com