i am a hopeless sugar addict. I was feeling proud of myself for all the bad things i was avoiding, when my boss dropped off two box of girl scout cookies i ordered last month and totally forgot about! I really don't want them, i'm not even sure why i got two entire boxes. we all know i have no self control so really, i'd just end up binging on them and hating myself. my original inclination is to throw them away but they are 4 box a pop and wasting them acutally hurts a little. I wanted to put them in the back for everybody but then i feel like i'm just transferring my guilt onto others. most of my coworkers try to eat pretty well, especially the girls. so yeah. in the trash they go, i suppose.

anyways graduation is around the corner and i have decided to go forward with the nose job. i was really hesitant with all the health risks, the possibility of it ending up bad, and all the people judging me. Honestly no one even reads this and I was reluctant to put it in here. Dan is vehemently against it. Going as far to say if i go through with it he would break up with me. (eye roll) it's something i've wished for since i was around 13. I never gave it too much thought because I never thought it was a realistic possibility. Then, when i was around 18 my mom came to me and said she'd be willing to pay for one, because she knew how much i hated the bump on my nose. I had never expressed the idea of a nose job to anyone especially my parents. I was afraid of hurting my dads feelings (it is a carbon copy of his nose, & he always says how he likes that I look just like him. its also one of the few things we have in common.) From that point on it was decided it would be a graduation gift. I've gone back and forth on it a few times. But if I'm honest with myself, its something i really want. as vain and shallow as it is.

I realize it won't matter in the grand scheme of things, its just a fucking bump on my nose. and that millions of people have them. at the same time, if i have the choice and the means to change something that bothers me, why not? I don't have kids, I'm a grown woman, i have 2 jobs and i'm finishing college. What better time than now?